This is the first of a series by Lamar Hardwick on Working Through and Dealing With the Aftermath of Pain, Suffering and Grief, which we are categorizing as Aftermath of Pain. A difficult subject and one that many just want to side-step, yet all of us face it multiple times in our life, regardless of our story.
In this study we will use Right Now Media for a short clip, but the study can be done without the video if necessary. We hope you lean into this and glean the blessings.
Session Goals
Every session has specific goals—things you want your group to walk away knowing, feeling, and committing to do.
Main Idea: When we have questions about the suffering we experience, we must remember that God is aware of our suffering.
Head Change: To realize that suffering afflicts everyone – the righteous and the unrighteousness.
Heart Change: To accept that God is aware of our suffering and cares about our needs.
Life Change: To turn to God for strength amid fear and discouragement.
Share about a time when you have wondered, “Why me?”
The “why me” question is common to humanity, and it assumes that something special about you should exempt you from human suffering.
Yet each day, many people lose their job, experience death in the family, or receive a cancer diagnosis. These forms of suffering plague humanity. Suffering is not the exception but the rule in this fallen world. How do we deal with suffering while maintaining faith in a sovereign, loving God?
In this session, Lamar Hardwick relays the questions he had following his cancer diagnosis. What he learned through the turmoil that followed is a reminder for each of us: God is aware of our suffering. He has already made provision for the troubles that we must endure.
Read Matthew 13:24-43.
Show Session 1: Why Me? (5 minutes).
Discuss
Lamar shared his story about the resurgence of cancer that occurred while he faithfully served the Lord. He mentioned that amid “a pretty good life during a pretty challenging year,” his cancer came. He “felt like life was sending me mixed messages.”
When have your positive efforts been overshadowed by significant difficulties?
GOD’S ROLE IN SUFFERING IS COMPLICATED.
Read Matthew 13:24-26.
Lamar explained these four basic human assumptions about life.
- Good people live and get good things.
- Bad people live and get bad things.
- Good and bad cannot co-exist.
- If God exists and God is good, then bad should not exist if God exists in us.
When have you been surprised that one of these assumptions has not held true for you?
The farmer who planted good seed would have expected very few weeds, yet many weeds appeared. Ultimately, this story relates to people who may or may not belong to God’s kingdom. Lamar also relates this parable to our efforts to sow and harvest what is good in life. It isn’t always so simple. Why should the appearance of weeds among the wheat of our lives not surprise us?
Because this world is fallen, we will always deal with the consequences of sin. These consequences may result from our direct action, but often they simply happen. What habits can prepare us to expect and face the weeds of life?
GOD IS AWARE OF THE SUFFERING THAT WE MUST ENDURE.
Read Matthew 13:27-28.
Lamar notes, “What’s interesting about the parable of the wheat and weeds is that when the workers presented the farmer with the problem, he was already aware of what was happening.” This farmer reflects our heavenly Father, who is fully aware of every challenge that will come our way. How does the knowledge that God is aware of your suffering make you feel?
Life’s weeds are more than a mere nuisance. They can impact the most basic aspects of our experience. Describe the struggles that you have seen people endure. Why do you think God allows these trials in the lives of those He loves?
GOD OFFERS HIS PRESENCE TO COMFORT US IN OUR SUFFERING.
Read Matthew 13:29-30.
The farmer in Jesus’ parable explained that an enemy had sown the weeds. The trials you face are often not a result of your own sin but the result of life in a fallen, sin-filled world. Rest in that truth! The farmer’s strategy was to put up with the weeds until harvest to protect the wheat. How would uprooting the weeds in your life also uproot the good that God is doing in you?
Lamar explained his difficult experience with cancer and the knowledge that God was aware of the impact it has had on his life. How do your struggles enable you to draw closer to God?
God allows every aspect of life – the good and the bad, the wheat and the weeds – to draw us closer to Him. Suffering is painful, yet through it we can learn more about the character of our loving heavenly Father. Lamar quoted Isaiah 41:10, which says, “Don’t be afraid for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you.”
We often attempt to avoid suffering, but perhaps God has allowed suffering in your life because He is doing a special work in your heart. What will you do this week to bring your struggles to God and draw upon His strength?