What do you typically do when you are feeling down? What helps you get through a tough day?

There’s nothing wrong with taking a nap or watching TV when we feel overwhelmed, but our simple coping strategies can become lifestyles of avoidance. We live in a culture that doesn’t like the idea of sadness. We often seek to avoid the pain of mourning by suppressing our grief or distracting ourselves from our feelings. The idea of embracing our sadness is unusual, even unwanted.

This week we come to understand that mourning is not something to avoid, but a pathway to blessing. And when we mourn, we can be sure that will be comforted by God himself.

¹ Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him.

The Beatitudes
² And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
³ “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
⁴ “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
⁵ “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
⁶ “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
⁷ “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
⁸ “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
⁹ “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons[a] of God.
¹⁰ “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
¹¹ “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. ¹² Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Matthew 5:1-12 ESV

Why is it important to know the Beatitudes highlight eight characteristics of the same person?

What are the three reasons mourning is a sign of the kingdom?

How does mourning help us develop compassion?

We must realize and remember that Jesus didn’t just show up looking for the “blessed” people. Instead, Jesus shapes us ordinary people into these sorts of people.

How is the idea that Jesus is looking for “blessed” people different from the idea that he shapes us into “blessed” people? Why is it good news that Jesus shapes us into the kinds of people described in the Beatitudes?

Why do you think the second Beatitude is so significant for us today?

We all regularly encounter pain and heartbreak because we live in a world fractured by sin. To protect ourselves from pain, grief, and sadness we develop coping mechanisms. But coping can prevent us from dealing with reality and distract us from our emotions.

What are some of the coping mechanisms you have used to protect yourself? In what ways have your coping mechanisms been ineffective long-term solutions?

One of the dangers of running to our coping mechanisms instead of grieving is that we end up having nowhere to take our disappointments. So, instead of mourning, we “drink a little bit too much or watch a little bit too much Netflix,” and never deal with our sadness.

When we consistently try to avoid feelings of pain instead of properly mourning, what two emotions did Matt say most often emerge?

In a culture that often pursues happiness at all costs, it is stated that “mourning is a sign of the kingdom” may seem backward. But there seems to be three reasons/ways mourning reveals God is at work:

• our mourning of personal sin
• our mourning over the brokenness of the world
• our growth in compassion in response to both.

Which of these three “kingdom qualities” do you tend to avoid or suppress? What things can you do to practice these kingdom qualities?

As we grow closer to Jesus, we become more aware of our sin. As we grow more aware of our sin, we grow more prone to lamenting our sin, or to mourning.

Has personal sin ever caused you to feel grief? In that situation, how did you respond to that feeling? Did your conviction of sin cause you to run to Christ or did it lead to shame?

The common understanding of conviction is that it is a negative experience, meant to heap guilt or shame on ourselves. But conviction can be stated as “an invitation to a better life.” God uses mourning to turn us from sin to his grace and comfort.

In the future, how could you remind yourself that conviction, though uncomfortable, is an invitation to draw near to God? 

The world is full of brokenness. Our typical reaction to the injustice, moral failure, and corruption around us is unrighteous anger.

Where in our culture do you see unrighteous anger toward the world’s brokenness? Where, and in what ways, does anger over the world’s brokenness present itself in your own life?

Instead of anger, how does the second Beatitude cause us to respond to the brokenness of the world?

Kingdom mourning has an outward movement to it. We first mourn our sin, then mourn the sin and brokenness around us. As God comforts us through our sadness, he develops compassion in us so that we can go out and be a comfort to others.

Have you ever considered that godly mourning creates compassion? In what way does mourning with others fulfill Jesus’s promise that those who mourn “will be comforted”?

To what extent do you prioritize comforting others as a response to the brokenness of the world?

It is not good to grieve in isolation. We must be willing to be comforted by the people God puts in our lives to not only participate in the act of comforting others but to be a recipient of that comfort ourselves.

What steps can you take today to welcome others into the sadness, lament, and mourning that you have experienced so that you can be comforted by them?

In our culture, mourning is not seen as something to embrace. Instead, it is viewed as something to distance ourselves from or avoid altogether. But when we mourn, by Jesus’s own assurance, we can be certain that we will be comforted.

God often takes us through mourning, not around it. We don’t have to grieve alone. God himself wants us to come to him so that he can comfort us. He has given us a community to support and mourn with us. And, through mourning, we grow in compassion. As he said, “Blessed are those who mourn,” for in our mourning there is comfort.

If you do not know someone who is struggling and needs comfort, pray for an opportunity to offer tangible comfort. Think of the ways you have been supported by others when you were mourning—what comforted you and some actions that may not have been as helpful as intended.