Distinguishing True Humility from Its Two Extremes:
False Humility and Pride
[thinking poorly of oneself, low self-esteem, feeling inferior] |
[lowly of heart – not arrogant or boastful, ready to serve, teachable] |
[vain glory, being conceited, feeling superior, arrogant] |
| Self-defeating mind-set and poor self-image, evaluating oneself too negatively – I’m a failure, I’m worthless, I can’t do anything right, no one likes me. | Self-forgetfulness, selflessness, not self-centered, not fearful about what others think of you, or preoccupied with self concerns | Self-conceited – thinking too highly of oneself – an exaggerated opinion or exalted view of oneself |
| Tendency to be self-despising or to belittle oneself, to be self-deprecating around others, excessively modest, due to feeling inferior, useless, or unworthy | Balanced view of self and good understanding of personal strengths and weaknesses, and one’s role and position in the wider community and society | Vanity and vainglory – excessive display, and boasting in one’s appearance, qualities, abilities, and achievements |
| Preoccupied with anxious concern for oneself, can’t focus on others | Self-giving and self-sacrificing for the sake of others in order to help, encourage,serve, and care for others | Self-centered, self-seeking, and selfish, concerned chiefly or only with yourself and your advantage, to the exclusion of others |
| People pleaser – does whatever others want regardless of what is the prudent or right thing to do | Lowly of heart – treats everyone with respect, care, and concern, regardless of their status, position, or worthiness, not playing favorites | Selfish ambition and the drive to get ahead of others at their expense |
| Timid or insecure – lacking in self- assurance, afraid to take initiative, afraid to speak up or be assertive when needed |
Other-focused, mindful of others’ interests and concerns, and ready to put aside personal preferences to serve others | Domineering and over-bearing, too demanding, too opinionated, too outspoken, too assertive |
| Overly dependent on what others think – lacks prudence to think and judge rightly | Servant-hearted, ready to serve others wholly for their good without seeking personal gain | Treats others as inferiors or unworthy of your care and concern |
| Fearful of correction and feedback because of low self-worth or poor self-image | Teachable, receptive to receiving correction, training, and feedback | Unteachable, refuses correction, resists feedback |
See helpful article:
Attaining True Greatness – Humility versus Pride.