As we go into part two of Enemies of the Heart by Andy Stanley, we are presented with the foundation of the book. Debt.
Our heart can grow weary. Things impact our physical heart, such as high cholesterol, triglycerides, and hypertension, to name a few. As devastating as these can be, there are four other enemies of the heart that are not measured directly at the doctor’s office. These enemies do not care about one’s age, family upbringing, education level or marital status. In fact, it does not even matter what kind of physical shape one is in, we are all vulnerable to the impacts they can impose.
What are the enemies you ask? They are:
- GUILT
- ANGER
- GREED
- JEALOUSY
As destructive as these enemies are, we will find out that they lose their power when exposed to the light. These dangerous enemies of the heart dissipate when they are exposed to the light of truth.
We will learn a lot more about these four super-powers in the coming weeks, and this week we will start with “guilt”.
When our embarrassment level is exceeded by our desperation level we are a candidate for God’s grace. – Peter Lord
Guilt: I owe You
How strange our American culture has embraced the concept of debt. Whether it is school loans, house mortgages, car payments, it just seems like that is a way of life. We actually chuckle at kids when they think life if tough and we think, about all that is going to be exposed to them when they “really grow up”. Well the same is apparent with the debt of our lives. Not financial, but emotional.
We start with guilt, because it can be the easiest to relate to. When we know we did something wrong, we can get that guilt feeling. Playing our own doctor, we prescribed the concept of paying some back for what we did. That is the basis of a guilt debt. We believe that if we did something wrong we will need to pay someone back for what we have done.
What is your thoughts and insights on guilt as a debt? Does it make sense? Have you experienced a guilt debt before? Are you in debt right now?
A dangerous aspect of this situation is that it can be mis-diagnosed as well. Guilt is a perspective. It can be established when someone perceives they have done something wrong. A burden can be weighted on someone’s heart inappropriately. It does not remove the debt to debtor relationship, until the situation is brought into the light.
Just like in financial situations, people’s behaviors are very similar with the emotional debt. When people are in a relational IOU position brought about by poor choices, they look for any excuse to be absent rather than face those they owe.
Have you experienced a similar behavior with someone that has let you down, become in debt to you emotionally?
How do face situations where you know you have done someone wrong. Did you casually slither around? Do you avoid conversations out of embarrassment? Do you offer up mere words to fend off the interactions?
While having an I Owe You mentality can lead to bad relational decisions, it’s the decisions that you can’t make that can cost the most.
The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender. – Proverbs 22:7 NIV
In summary, power belongs to those who are owed, not those who owe. This is also true for moral authority as well.
Nothing less than paying that debt will relieve a guilty heart of its burden of guilt. People try to work it off, serve it off, give it off, and even pray it off. But no amount of good deeds, community service, charitable giving, or Sundays in church can relieve the guilt. It’s a debt. And it must be paid or cancelled for a guilty heart to experience relief.
This week meditate on the situations in your life where you may have a mindset that you owe someone, or maybe you might even feel that someone else owes you. Capture the situations and pray about the condition of your heart and those involved. If it goes unattended, it still takes energy and if you can be relieved, you will feel so much better.
We will venture into therapy in a sense in the coming weeks where we learn the healthy anitdotes for dealing with the conditions of our emotional hearts. Be strong, and stay involved.
In the next two weeks (we won’t be meeting next week), read chapters 7 through 9, which will introduce the remaining three enemies of the heart: anger, greed and jealousy.